My burden to help troubled marriages compelled me to start a sermon series on communication in marriage relationships. When marriages fail, their demise can often be traced back to destructive communication patterns. My series will focus on four of these patterns.
Four negative patterns of communication that hurt good relationships:
1. Escalation: What Goes Around Comes Around
Escalation occurs when partners respond back and forth negatively to each other, continually upping the ante so the conversation gets more and more hostile.
2.Invalidation: Painful Put-Downs
Invalidation is a pattern in which one partner subtly or directly puts down the thoughts, feelings, or character of the other.
3. Negative Interpretation: When perception is worse than reality
Negative interpretations occur when one partner consistently believes that the motives of the other are more negative than is really the case. This can be a very destructive, negative pattern in a relationship. It makes any conflict or disagreement harder to deal with constructively
4. Withdrawal and Avoidance: Hide and Seek
Withdrawal can be as obvious as getting up and leaving the room or as subtle as “turning off” or “shutting down” during an argument. The withdrawer often tends to get quiet during an argument, look away, or agree quickly to a partner’s suggestion just to end the conversation.
This series looks deep into to matters of the the heart behind our communication (see Luke 6:45).You can listen to Pastor Steve’s series “The Power of Encouragement in Your Marriage” online at www.millersvillebiblechurch.org or call the office to order the Serie’s on CD.